I have a lot of delusions. I survive this world by living in ignorance, ignoring the things that would make me so angry or sad at the crimes, stupidity and lack of logic in humanity that I would surely become a sociopath. Ignorance is bliss, almost.
I supplement ignorance with a very active, some might say delusional, imagination. I believe the difference is knowing that fine line of what could be real and what probably isn’t; I have a very hard time defining that for certain in my head. I am pretty sure I know what people WANT to hear, and where they count the extremists (those wackos who believe in aliens and angels and that maybe some tv and movie plots are based on real life stuff they are trying to sneak into culture to make it more acceptable hello X-Files and MIB and Autistic kids who can do telepathy)….okay so maybe just maybe I have some of my own theories.
Sometimes it seems clear to me that as an angel I chose to be a human and try all the human accoutrements. God’s greatest challenge, “perfect Love casts out fear, for in perfect love there can be no fear”, speaks to me to try as many of these human experiences as I feel drawn too, but human fear, that which separates me from God, from perfect Love. FEAR keeps me from doing all I long to do.
Fear is what makes humans do everything contrary to progression. Rules to seperate us from sharing and communing with each other, rules to feed our egos and selves everything that says “IT’S MINE so don’t harm my property, my life, my thoughts, my little bubble of POSSESSION I have created to feel SAFE because I FEAR: I am lacking LOVE”. When we face fear and see I am afraid of being poor so I dont want to give that person my money, but we do it anyways, give them half or all we have and choose not to fear what will happen to us, Love can take over and do something amazing, but it is a surprise always a surprise.